Terror Threat Averted: 7-Year-Old Suspended For Pretending to Throw a Grenade

Alex Evans is a 7-year-old boy from Colorado, who thought he could ‘rescue the world’ when he spent his recess throwing an imaginary grenade at some imaginary evil doers.

Instead, Evans got a lesson that the world needs more rescuing than his little mind can possibly wrap itself around right now, when school administrators suspended him for the act because it violated their ‘safe environment’ policy.

I’m not kidding…

Via KDVR (h/t Weasel Zippers):

A 2nd grader has been suspended from school in Loveland for a make believe game he was playing.

The 7-year-old says he was trying to save the world. But school administrators say he broke a key rule during his pretend play.

“I was trying to save people and I just can’t believe I got dispended,” says Alex Evans, who doesn’t understand his suspension any better than he can pronounce it.

“It’s called ‘rescue the world,’” he says.

He was playing a game during recess at Loveland’s Mary Blair Elementary School and threw an imaginary grenade into a box with pretend evil forces inside.

“I pretended the box, there’s something shaking in it, and I go ‘pshhh.’”

The boy didn’t throw anything real or make any threats against anyone. He explains he was pretending to be the hero. “So nothing can get out and destroy the world.”

But his imaginary play broke the school’s real rules. The school lists “absolutes” designed to keep a safe environment. The list includes absolutely no fighting, real or imaginary; no weapons, real or imaginary.

Somebody needs to smack some common sense back into the vacant heads of the adults at schools willing to “dispend” a 5, 6, or 7-year old, when they play with imaginary guns, Nerf guns, or simply point their fingers like a gun.

And the smack needs to be real.

Watch the video of the news report on little Alex Evans.

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