RUSH TRANSCRIPT:

KIMMEL: A lot of people have been saying I’m not qualified to talk about this and that is true, I’m not qualified to talk about this. But I think those people forget, Bill Cassidy named this test after me. Am I supposed to just be quiet about that? Some of these characters they drag out of the swamp to defend this. This morning Fox had the other Senator from Louisiana, John Kennedy, no relation as you will clearly see — This is what he had to say about me.

KENNEDY [clip]: “Our biggest opponents appear to be at this point senator Bernie Sanders and Jimmy Kimmel. Bernie is Bernie. I don’t know Mr. Kimmel, he’s a funny guy, but I don’t think anybody would confuse him with a well-respected health care expert. I wouldn’t take advice from Charlie Sheen either.”

KIMMEL: “Listen, lady. I don’t know how many times I have to say it. I’m not pretending to be an expert, I’m asking why people like you aren’t listening to actual experts like the American Medical Association. And by the way, the fact that Charlie Sheen is still alive means he probably knows more about health care than any of us do. But I understand the gist. I should not be the guy you go to for information on health care. And if these guys, like inbred John Kennedy, would tell the truth for a change, I wouldn’t have to. I see these comments from these angry people, they say what qualified you to talk about this stuff? You’re a comedian, go back to being not funny. And I feel like it’s my duty to remind these people, who are so concerned about my qualifications, the guy you voted for for president? His job qualification was this.”

TRUMP [clip]: “Meatloaf, you’re fired.”

KIMMEL: “Okay? He fired Meatloaf on television. Then you put him in the White House.”